Losing My Last Name

This post “Losing My Last Name” originally appeared on May 22, 2014 at The Hooray Collective. Go over there to see the incredible work they are doing.


In 23 days I am getting married.

The next time you hear from me, I will go by a different name. While my first and middle name will remain the same, my last name will have changed. I’ll have a new driver’s license (with brown hair, not blonde like my current license) and a new last name. Once I become Mrs. O, I’ll now fall in the middle of the alphabet, and I’ll have to listen for a new name to be called when I pick up prescriptions.

And I consider this a very beautiful thing.

I’m looking forward to sharing a last name with the man I love. I look forward to sharing my step-son’s last name with him as well.

But yet…

I’ll miss my last name.

I’ll miss the connection it gives me to my parents and my brothers and my nieces and nephews. I’ll miss the connection it gives me to my grandmother and grandfather who are no longer with us. I recognize myself as Miss C. Soon, I won’t be her any longer.

I’ve always wanted to change my last name when I got married so that I’d share a name with my husband. So this was an easy decision for me. I just didn’t expect to feel so nostalgic about my current last name. I toyed with keeping it as a middle name, but what would I do with my current middle name? In the end, I chose to just switch last names, and say goodbye to my maiden name.

I can’t be the only person who has experienced this nostalgia before. How did you all feel when you changed your name?


  1. Katelin Bannan (@katelin) says:

    I was a little nostalgic when I changed my last name but at the same time, I fully embraced my new one. It was a weird transition but a welcomed one. Hopefully one day one of my children can have my maiden name as a middle name and even then, I still feel connected to that name as it will always be a part of me.

    • erin says:

      I guess that is a good way to describe how I feel: nostalgic. I’m so excited to share Mr. O’s last name (Call me Mrs. O from now on haha) but I guess it is just something that takes getting used to! I’m glad you felt the same.

  2. suki says:

    Most people are surprised that I would want to keep my last name. Considering it is one that can easily be made fun of, it’s still a part of my identity. And since Ryan and I are an interracial couple, I feel a little weird attaching a non-Asian name to my own.

    • erin says:

      Very valid points, Suki! I don’t know why people have such strong opinions about other people’s decisions. I totally understand why you’d want to keep your own name! Thanks for stopping by 🙂

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